Icon Brands
Darth Invader 14" Dildo
A 14-inch dark lord dildo with suction cup. Fan boy meets fist boy. The Dark Side has never been this literal.
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The most popular and highest-rated intimate products on This Is Why U CUM, ranked by community likes.
227 products
Icon Brands
A 14-inch dark lord dildo with suction cup. Fan boy meets fist boy. The Dark Side has never been this literal.
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Bad Dragon
A cockatrice-inspired toy. Half rooster, half serpent, fully committed to making your Monster Manual collection feel inadequate.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A D&D 20-sided die turned into a ball gag. Roll for initiative in the dungeon — both kinds.
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Fleshlight
An alien-themed Fleshlight with a xenomorph-style entrance. Three signature textures combined. In space, everyone can hear you.
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Sinnovator
Six platinum silicone alien eggs for ovipositor play. Half a dozen reasons to question your browsing history.
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Uberrime
An H.R. Giger-inspired alien dildo with biomechanical musculature. Art history class just got interesting.
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Alien Nation
A self-lubricating alien dildo in red and silver. It erupts. On demand. The volcano metaphor writes itself.
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Kiiroo
230 strokes per minute. Syncs to VR content, cam shows, and your partner's device worldwide. The metaverse just got real.
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Chakrubs
A crystal pleasure tool available in rose quartz, obsidian, clear quartz, AND sodalite. Named after the Talu chakra point. This is a geology degree you actually want.
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Emojibator
Eggplant, banana, chili pepper, and pickle vibrators in one box. The world's most suspicious fruit basket. Perfect housewarming gift.
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Fizzin Bath Bombs
A luxury bath bomb that dissolves to reveal a waterproof bullet vibrator inside. It's a Kinder Surprise for adults, except the surprise actually does something useful.
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Glas
A 7-inch hand-blown glass dildo shaped like a banana. For scale and for pleasure. Finally answers the question 'is that a banana or are you just happy to see me?' Both. It is both.
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Motorbunny
A ride-on sex machine that vibrates AND thrusts. Bluetooth app control. Multiple attachments. This is the mechanical bull your local bar wishes it could be.
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Mr S Leather
A premium neoprene hood designed for breath play with controlled airflow. Handmade in San Francisco by artisans who have SEEN things.
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Odyssey Toys
An alien egg-laying dildo with 4 textured eggs. Load, lube, and launch. The alien reproduction manual you never knew you needed.
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Uncover Creations
A curved alien ovipositor with ribbed details and egg-laying capability. The original Alien Ovipositor. Accept no substitutes.
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Autoblow
14 POUNDS of aluminum luxury. 225 strokes/min. Has an AI Companion chat that controls the device. The Rolls-Royce of suction. Made of actual metal.
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Body Candy
316L surgical steel nipple rings that glow in the dark. Because apparently regular nipple jewelry wasn't enough — yours need to be a beacon.
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CB-X
The industry standard in male chastity. Polycarbonate cage with numbered locks. Comes with 5 different ring sizes because fit matters, even in captivity.
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Self Delve
A hyper-realistic silicone corn cob dildo. Every kernel individually sculpted. The farmers market will never be the same.
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BMS Enterprises
A glow-in-the-dark vibrating cock ring with 9 functions, USB rechargeable, and a removable bullet. Your junk, now with ambient lighting.
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Cute Little Fuckers
A gender-inclusive alien creature vibrator. It's a non-binary pleasure alien. It has a backstory. It has pronouns. Welcome to the future.
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LELO
A 24-karat gold anal plug. $2,490. Made-to-order, 30-day production. For the person who has literally everything except this.
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Lovense
300 strokes per minute. App-controlled from anywhere on earth. Double-sided for two. Your partner in Tokyo controls your evening in Montreal.
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Mystim
Wireless e-stim power box that controls up to 8 receivers simultaneously. You can literally zap 8 body parts at once. Party planning has never been this electrifying.
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Neon Cowboys
Battery-powered LED shapes — cherries, stars, hearts, lightning bolts — that stick onto pasties. Water-resistant. For when you want your chest to be the main event at the rave.
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njoy
THREE POUNDS of polished stainless steel. Eleven inches long. Costs $400. This is the Excalibur of dildos. Whoever wields it is worthy.
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Sincerely Fearless
Earrings that are actually tiny working vibrators. Available in 5 colors. The most discreet accessory you'll ever own that doubles as a conversation killer at dinner parties.
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Syncbot
An AI-powered masturbator that syncs to video in real-time using 'PornGPT' AI. Thrusts, rotates, and suctions. Silicon Valley's most awkward startup pitch.
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Vex Toys
A platinum silicone ice cream cone dildo. 8 inches tall. Handmade. Each one unique. Your soft-serve obsession has entered dangerous territory.
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Bad Dragon
A direwolf fantasy toy with cumtube option. Winter is coming, and honestly, so are you.
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Geeky Sex Toys
An 11.6-inch purple tentacle with shimmering gold accents and suction cup base. The Kraken has been released. Into your bedroom.
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Fleshlight
A Bigfoot-themed Fleshlight. The yeti of male pleasure. Blurry photos of this toy have been spotted in men's nightstands across America.
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Sinnovator
A tentacle dildo from 12 to 22.5 inches. Named after a Lovecraftian god. Depth training has never been this cosmic.
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Uberrime
The large version of The Damn Alien. Bigger alien. Bigger exclamation point. Bigger everything.
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Alien Nation
A remote-controlled THRUSTING dragon dildo in red and black. It thrusts. By itself. The dragon does the work.
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Kiiroo
She gets the Spot egg vibrator, he gets the Keon automatic stroker, both sync together in real-time. It's like multiplayer gaming but everyone finishes.
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Chakrubs
A hand-polished crystal curved dildo available in rose quartz, obsidian, and clear quartz. Comes with a velvet pouch and a guided meditation practice. Your yoni has never been so spiritually aligned.
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Emojibator
A pickle-shaped vibrator. Waterproof. 10 vibration modes. Looks exactly like something you'd leave in the fridge to confuse your roommate.
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Fizzin Bath Bombs
A penis-shaped soap available in Aphrodisiac Purple, Hugo Boss Black, and Fantasy Pink. For when you want to wash your hands and question your life choices simultaneously.
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Glas
An 8-inch glass dildo shaped like a corn cob. Hand-blown borosilicate glass. Dishwasher safe. Finally, a corn on the cob you do not bring to a barbecue.
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Motorbunny
A ride-on vibrating sex machine with Bluetooth app control and interchangeable attachments. 6500 RPM of vibration. It is essentially a roomba for your pleasure centers.
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Mr S Leather
Premium neoprene hood with removable eye and mouth panels. Like a wetsuit for your face, but the only diving you'll be doing is into the deep end of your kink list.
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Odyssey Toys
An H.R. Giger-inspired knot-style dildo for those who crave stretch. Available in 3 sizes. The bigger the xenomorph, the bigger the stretch.
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Uncover Creations
A xenomorph-inspired ovipositor with 3 eggs included. The full alien reproductive experience. Eggs sold separately. Just kidding, they're included.
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Bad Dragon
The flagship dragon. Duke is THE Bad Dragon. The OG. The one your friend told you about in a hushed whisper.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A 6-piece BDSM kit including a lightsaber flogger and Death Star ball gag. The Dark Side has cookies AND restraints.
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Fleshlight
A purple predator-themed stroker with ribbed texture. The hunter becomes the hunted. Sexually.
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Sinnovator
An alien insect ovipositor in metallic blue with claspers and 3 textured eggs. Extraterrestrial insemination, handcrafted.
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Uberrime
A UV-reactive alien dildo that glows under blacklight. Your G-spot just became a rave venue.
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Alien Nation
A glow-in-the-dark ovipositor that comes with eggs. It lays eggs. And it glows. The alien lifecycle has never been so fun.
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Kiiroo
Two interactive strokers that sync together over the internet. One vibrates with 9 motors, the other does realistic up-down stroking. For couples who both have penises and also broadband.
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Bad Dragon
A wolf-dragon hybrid with a textured shaft and pronounced knot. For when regular werewolf fantasies aren't specific enough.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A pumpkin-shaped ball gag for spooky season enthusiasts. Trick or treat just got significantly more complicated.
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Fleshlight
A xenomorph-inspired stroker with an intense internal texture. H.R. Giger would be proud. Or horrified. Probably both.
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Sinnovator
An alien appendage with claws and ventral scales that deposits eggs 9 inches deep. Nature is beautiful. Alien nature is beautiful-er.
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Uberrime
A handmade alien tentacle dildo in platinum silicone. The tentacle you've been waiting for, crafted by artisans.
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Bad Dragon
Short, girthy, and covered in studs. Flint is the dragon who skipped leg day but never skipped texture day.
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Geeky Sex Toys
An 11.6-inch vibrating sword dildo with 10 patterns and illuminated power button. The high ground has never been more relevant.
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Fleshlight
A zombie-themed Fleshlight in undead green. Because the zombie apocalypse gets lonely. Braaaaains optional.
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Sinnovator
An exoskeleton-detailed alien dildo with undulating shaft. Available as an ejaculating model. The alien has options.
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Bad Dragon
Squid tentacle fantasy toy. Hentai fans, your prayers have been answered. Available in every color of the rainbow.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A magical girl wand vibrator that would make Sailor Moon proud. In the name of the moon, it will punish you. Gently.
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Bad Dragon
Dragon-inspired with dramatic ridging and scale textures. Like Smaug meets your nightstand. Khaleesi approved.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A Pikachu-inspired butt plug. You chose it. It's super effective. We are not responsible for what you yell when you use it.
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Bad Dragon
An alien breeder fantasy toy. The xenomorph's more fun cousin. In space, no one can hear you... never mind.
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Geeky Sex Toys
12 inches of gamma-powered glow-in-the-dark fury. Hulk smash just got a whole new meaning.
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Bad Dragon
A toy that deposits gelatin eggs inside you. Alien egg-laying fantasy. This is peak internet. We've reached the summit.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A Death Star-shaped silicone ball gag. Join the Dark Side — they have better accessories.
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Bad Dragon
A German Shepherd-inspired fantasy toy. Man's best friend just got significantly more complicated.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A 12-inch lightsaber vibrator that glows in 6 LED colors with 10 vibration modes. May the force be in you.
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Bad Dragon
A T-Rex-themed silicone toy. Short arms, big personality. 65 million years of evolution led to this moment.
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Bad Dragon
For when regular anatomy just doesn't cut it anymore. Silicone tentacle. The anime fans know what's up.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A deep navy blue tentacle dildo with spiral ridges and a suction cup base. First contact has never been this hands-free.
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Alien Nation
A rechargeable vibrating grinder with remote control in copper and purple. Grind on an alien. With a remote. The future.
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Fleshlight
A 9-inch silicone alien dildo from the Fleshlight universe. The king has arrived, and he brought texture.
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Uberrime
A demon knot alien dildo at sixty-nine dollars. The price. The knot. The alien design. Everything aligns.
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LELO
Three motors, WaveMotion AND SenSonic tech in one device. The Swiss Army knife of pleasure, except Swedish.
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Uncover Creations
A slim alien dildo with heavy ribbed textures. The sequel: slimmer, ribbier, and still very alien.
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Chakrubs
A pleasure wand carved from pure amethyst crystal. Promotes calm, clarity, and apparently orgasms. Hand-polished. Each one unique. Your crystal healing practitioner forgot to mention this application.
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Hot Octopuss
Premium edging masturbator with wrist-strap remote. PulsePlate tech works even when you're not hard. The luxury model for when your penis deserves a corner office.
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Lovense
Adjustable dual-motor prostate massager with app control. More settings than your car seat.
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Mystim
E-stim vibrator that does double duty: vibrations AND electric pulses at the same time. Because apparently regular orgasms were too boring for you.
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Crave
Stainless steel cuff bracelets that are actually bondage restraints. Magnetic clasp connects them. Wear to brunch, use at night. Fashion-forward kink.
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Glas
A handcrafted borosilicate glass dildo that glows in the dark. Temperature-responsive. Turn off the lights and play lightsaber. 3-year warranty.
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Kiiroo
Automatic stroker that syncs to VR content. 230 strokes per minute. That's faster than you can say 'I need an adult.'
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MysteryVibe
Six independent motors in a bendable body. Shape it to fit any anatomy. App-controlled with 16 vibration patterns. It's like a Swiss Army knife that only does one thing, extremely well.
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Autoblow
AI-powered. Machine-learning algorithms trained on real data. Your engineering degree has led to this moment.
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Creature Cocks
A muscular rippled tentacle dildo with suction cup. The tentacle fantasy, now with reptile textures.
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Dame
Hands-free vibe that sits on your body during sex like a tiny vibrating passenger. More reliable than most dates.
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Emojibator
The eggplant emoji, but it vibrates. 10 settings. Medical-grade silicone. Finally, a reason to use that emoji unironically.
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Adam & Eve
A glass dildo that looks like a candy swirl lollipop. Temperature play ready. It's giving Willy Wonka's forbidden back room.
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Hodge Podge Entourage
A biomechanical alien robot dildo. Part machine, part organic, entirely committed to the sci-fi aesthetic.
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Little Genie
A stripping card game where the loser of each round performs the action on their card. It's War meets strip poker, but with less strategy and more skin.
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Neon Cowboys
9 feet of LED light sewn into a cowboy hat. 8+ hours of glow, water-resistant, 8 colors available. Worn by Post Malone and Miranda Lambert. Yeehaw just got an upgrade.
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Odyssey Toys
A knotted alien dildo with a ribbed shaft. Rated 4.94 stars by people who know exactly what they want.
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Perifit
An FDA-cleared kegel trainer that connects to an app with 14 video games. Your pelvic floor controls a bird, a car, or a spaceship. Gaming has reached places it was never meant to go.
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Honey Play Box
A pig-shaped air pulse clitoral vibrator. Oink oink. It's cute, it's pink, and it uses pressure waves. This little piggy went to... nevermind.
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Shinesty
Underwear with messages and designs so explicit they'd make your grandmother need smelling salts. Dangerously comfortable, aggressively inappropriate.
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Sinnovator
Named after a galaxy 2.5 million light-years away. The dildo is closer. And more textured.
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Tantus
Heart-shaped silicone paddle that leaves heart imprints. Slap someone with love. Literally. The most romantic violence you'll ever commit.
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Unihorn
A unicorn-shaped clitoral vibrator with a pulsing tongue. 10 speeds, 10 patterns. Magical, mythical, and absolutely unhinged.
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We-Vibe
An aluminum alloy vibrator that changes temperature. Heat it up in warm water, cool it down in cold. Your vagina now has climate control like a luxury sedan.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A sparkle-infused silicone dragon dildo that looks like it was forged in the nebula of a dying star. Textured. Mythological. Very sparkly.
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Alien Nation
A dual-ended alien dildo in blue and green. Two ends. Two demons. One very specific evening ahead.
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Fleshlight
A blue alien-themed stroker with ribbed internal texture. Like dating someone from Pandora but without the cultural complications.
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Uberrime
A G-spot targeting alien dildo with a bulbous head and bump pairs. The exclamation point in the name is earned.
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LELO
AI-powered sonic stroker with Cruise Control. Named like a Formula 1 car. Pit stop not included.
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Uncover Creations
A tapered alien dildo with bumps and a G-spot curve. The trilogy concludes. Perfectly.
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Chakrubs
A dildo carved from pure rose quartz crystal. For manifesting, healing, meditation, and... other things. Comes with a velvet pouch. Your yoga teacher would be so proud.
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Hot Octopuss
Dual-motor with separate treble and bass vibration controls. EQ your orgasm like a DJ mixing board. 100% hands-free.
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Lovense
An app-controlled thrusting dildo with suction base. Your partner can control it from across the world. Long-distance relationships just became an engineering challenge.
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Mystim
Simon says... get electrocuted. This e-stim vibrator combines 8 vibration modes with 5 electrostim programs. Simon is NOT playing games.
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Crave
A vibrator pendant that doubles as fine jewelry. Available in rose gold, silver, and 24k gold. Four speeds. Your grandmother will ask where you got that lovely necklace.
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Glas
An 8-inch glow-in-the-dark glass dildo shaped like a chili pepper. Borosilicate glass. Temperature play compatible. Art gallery meets adult store.
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Kiiroo
She gets a G-spot vibe with three signature bumps. He gets a wearable egg vibrator. Both sync via app for long-distance intimacy. Your WiFi bill just became foreplay.
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MysteryVibe
Wearable vibrator for penises with six motors that wraps around like a saddle. Stimulates him AND her during sex. App-controlled. Designed with urologists. Your doctor's office just got weird.
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Geeky Sex Toys
An anime-inspired kawaii bondage kit in pastel colors. Cute enough for your shelf, kinky enough for your nightstand.
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Alien Nation
A glow-in-the-dark dragon creature dildo in blue, purple, orange, and red. It is a dragon. That glows. In the dark.
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Fleshlight
An anime-inspired fantasy stroker from Fleshlight's sci-fi collection. When 2D meets 3D. In the most literal way possible.
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Uberrime
A double-headed alien fantasy dildo. Two heads are better than one. Especially when they're from space.
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LELO
Oral sex simulator with a rotating tongue node 25% faster than V2. Won design awards. Very specific thing to put on your mantel.
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Uncover Creations
A thick, top-heavy alien dildo with a bulbous shaft. Available in 5 sizes and 25 colors. Customize your alien encounter.
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Chakrubs
A sleek pleasure wand carved from volcanic black obsidian. Absorbs negative energy. Allegedly. What we know for sure: it's a beautiful stone phallus and it means business.
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Hot Octopuss
Iridescent dragon-eye themed male vibrator. Works on flaccid penises. Accessibility meets fantasy. The dragon sees all.
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Lovense
Oscillating penis massager controlled from your phone. Hands-free. More connected than your smart home.
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Mystim
A German-engineered e-stim power box that lets you control electric tingles from 'barely there' to 'WHAT THE HELL.' Your safe word is 'voltage.'
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Geeky Sex Toys
A 7-inch shimmering mermaid-inspired dildo. If mermaids lived in space, their technology would look exactly like this. Iridescent. Otherworldly.
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Alien Nation
A purple and gold alien obelisk dildo. Like the monolith from 2001: A Space Odyssey, but insertable.
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Fleshlight
A compact, open-ended alien stroker in metallic green. For solo or couples use. Close encounters of the intimate kind.
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Uberrime
An alien dildo with a name that sounds like a distant planet. Handmade platinum silicone from the artisans of the cosmos.
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LELO
A remote-controlled couples vibrator with a ring of 24-karat gold. Comes with actual 'breakup insurance' from LELO. Dual motors. Eight modes. The only sex toy that hedges against heartbreak.
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Uncover Creations
A wide-tipped alien dildo with bumps for G and P-spot stimulation. Stare into The Void. The Void stares back.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A full nurse-themed BDSM kit. The doctor will NOT see you now. But Nurse Ratchet might.
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Alien Nation
A rechargeable vibrating alien creature dildo in yellow and green. It vibrates AND looks like a space creature. Multitasking.
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Fleshlight
An 8-inch silicone fantasy dildo from Fleshlight's dark side. The reaper cometh. And so shall you.
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Uberrime
A bizarre alien life form from many light-years away, now available in platinum silicone. Six inches of extraterrestrial evolution.
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LELO
Couples vibe with SenseMotion — the remote responds to wrist movements. Conducting an orchestra, but the orchestra is in your pants.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A tentacled stroker that looks like a space creature grabbed your junk. The face-hugger you actually want.
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Alien Nation
A glow-in-the-dark rechargeable clitoral vibrator with remote control. The alien brought a spotlight. For your clit.
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Fleshlight
A death-themed fantasy stroker with intense internal texture. The grim reaper came for you. But like, in the fun way.
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Uberrime
An alien tentacle dildo at the nice price. Sixty-nine dollars for a tentacle from the stars.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A droid-shaped clitoral vibrator with 3 speeds and 30 patterns. These are the droids you were looking for.
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Alien Nation
A purple and pink serpentine alien dildo that twists and curves. Space snakes. On your nightstand.
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Fleshlight
A transparent Fleshlight engineered to simulate oral. Three points of initial contact, tight inner canal. The see-through part is either a feature or a dare.
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Uberrime
An alien dildo with an unpronounceable name and unmistakable intentions. The X is silent. The orgasm is not.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A pink glitter dragon dildo that sparkles like a unicorn sneezed on it. Fabulous, textured, and absolutely ridiculous.
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Alien Nation
A gold creature dildo that looks like it was forged on an alien planet. The venom is metaphorical. The pleasure is not.
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Fleshlight
A transparent blue blowjob simulator called Turbo Thrust Blue Ice. It looks like a portal to another dimension. The dimension where you finish in 4 minutes.
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Geeky Sex Toys
Nintendo-inspired suction stimulator with licking tongue. Thank you Mario, but the orgasm is in another castle.
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Geeky Sex Toys
9-inch slimy-green heavily ribbed tentacle dildo. Rise from the depths. Your swamp, your rules.
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LELO
Pinpoint clitoral vibrator with a tiny elliptical tip that flutters. LELO miniaturized precision engineering and made it waterproof.
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Hot Octopuss
Dual-motor cock ring that vibrates for both partners simultaneously. One motor on the clit, one on the perineum. It's a team sport now.
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Lovense
Mini wand with Bluetooth because apparently every object in your house needs an app now. Suitable for everyone.
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Tenga
A reusable stroker with a twist valve that adjusts suction in real time. Engineered like a Japanese sports car, used like... well.
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Crave
Dual-tip vibrator with independent motors on each prong. Straddle the clitoris from both sides. Looks like a tuning fork. Hits the right frequency every time.
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Fleshlight
A travel-sized Fleshlight called the Flight Pilot. Compact, discreet, TSA-friendly shape. Your carry-on just got an upgrade. Please do not use it at 30,000 feet.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A curved navy blue dildo with sparkle accents, expertly angled for prostate and G-spot exploration. Deep space has never been so accurately named.
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Kiiroo
Dual-stim interactive vibrator that syncs to your partner's device anywhere on earth. G-spot and clitoral at once. Long-distance relationships just got an upgrade.
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TENGA
A spinning stroker with alternating sphere textures inside. The internal coil rotates with each thrust. Called Beads. We can all agree that name is doing a lot of heavy lifting.
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Clone-A-Willy
Clone your willy in glow in the dark blue. It looks like a lightsaber. A very personal lightsaber.
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Dame Products
Pressure-wave suction toy with 5 intensities and 5 patterns. Designed by women engineers in NYC. Beautiful, quiet, devastating.
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njoy
Double-ended stainless steel wand. Small ball on one end, large on the other. Temperature play ready — run it under hot or cold water. Physics class just got interesting.
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Alien Nation
A glow-in-the-dark vibrating dildo in blue and pink. It finds the spot. While glowing. Alien GPS.
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Autoblow
Remote-controlled prostate massager from the people who brought you AI blowjobs. Waterproof, rechargeable, and controlled without reaching under your legs like a pretzel.
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Agreeable Agony
30 feet of UV-reactive bondage rope that glows electric blue under blacklight. Turn your bedroom into a tractor beam with shibari knots.
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Forplay
A 6-piece astronaut movie character costume with bra, panty, gloves, backpack, belt, and glasses. To infinity and beyond. Way beyond.
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Glas
An 8-inch glow-in-the-dark borosilicate glass dildo. Temperature play compatible. Handcrafted. Looks like a comet frozen in glass.
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Godemiche
Hand-poured artisanal silicone dildo from a small UK workshop. Custom colors available. Each one individually made. The Etsy of dildos, except these people actually know what they're doing.
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Hello Nancy
A lemon-shaped suction vibrator that replaced the Rose on TikTok. 12 air-pulse patterns. Under 50dB. When life gives you lemons, have an orgasm apparently.
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MysteryVibe
Tiny bendable bullet vibrator with two motors. Bend it into a U, an L, or whatever letter your anatomy prefers. App-controlled. The world's most flexible bullet.
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Mystim
Entry-level e-stim power box for the electrically curious. Think of it as e-stim 101 before you graduate to getting zapped by the Cluster Buster.
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Rocks Off
A rocket-shaped pocket vibrator with 10 speed settings. Shaped like an actual rocket. Named like one too. Houston, we have ignition.
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Reborn Ropes
30 feet of glow-in-the-dark bondage rope. Tie someone up and they become a constellation. Shibari just went intergalactic.
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Sportsheets
A door-mounted sex sling with padded seat and adjustable straps. Zero gravity simulation. No NASA training required. Supports 325 lbs.
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SVAKOM
Dual wearable stimulator with 11 vibration modes, 5 intensity levels, and app control for long-distance play. Partner interaction mode included. Your phone does more than you think.
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Tantus
Silicone paddle that delivers a satisfying THWACK. Dishwasher safe because hygiene matters even in chaos. Made in the USA.
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Uberrime
A first-time fantasy dildo for alien beginners. Your entry-level ticket to the cosmos. Training wheels for space.
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We're Not Really Strangers
The viral relationship card game went full NSFW. Deep questions about sex, intimacy, and desires that'll make you learn things about your partner you never asked.
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We-Vibe
Two vibrating cock rings in one box. One for each of you. Or both for one of you. We are not here to judge your ring stacking strategy.
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Xenocat Artifacts
A sci-fi platinum silicone artifact from Xenocat. Body-safe alien technology, discreetly shipped in a white box.
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LELO
A triple-stimulation sonic massager with app control. Looks like alien technology because it basically is. G-spot, A-spot, and clitoris simultaneously.
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Dame
Dame's most powerful wand with a curved handle. The name is... exactly what you think it is.
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Lovense
The latest generation of the internet's most famous wearable vibrator. Bluetooth. Unlimited patterns. Your long-distance relationship just got an engineering upgrade.
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Tenga
A disposable cup stroker with air-cushion chambers. Under 11 bucks for Japanese precision engineering. The Honda Civic of masturbation.
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Crave
Next-gen vibrator necklace in stainless steel or 24k gold. Four vibration modes. USB rechargeable. Your coworkers will compliment your jewelry and have no idea.
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Fleshlight
A compact blue alien stroker, open on both ends. The sequel is always bluer. And more alien.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A whimsical fairy dragon dildo in iridescent colors. Because regular dragons were too mainstream for your dungeon.
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Kiiroo
A G-spot vibrator that syncs with VR content and your partner's device across the globe. Touch-sensitive. The long-distance relationship just got a firmware update.
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TENGA
A spinning stroker with bold block textures. Called Brick. The firmest texture in the Spinner lineup. Brick by name, not by sensation. Thank God.
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Clone-A-Willy
Clone your willy and make it glow green. Because nothing says 'alien probe' like a glow in the dark replica of yourself.
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Dame Products
A plant-based candle that melts into warm massage oil. Kava Kava-infused. Scented with green tea and cedarwood. The only candle where spilling is the point.
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njoy
One pound of medical-grade stainless steel curved into the most legendary G-spot toy ever made. No batteries, no motors. Just physics and very deliberate engineering.
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LELO
Dual sonic-wave stimulation hitting two zones simultaneously. Looks like a sculpture from MoMA. Won design awards AND orgasm awards.
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Hot Octopuss
Hands-free penis vibrator with remote control and dual motors. Strap it on, lie back, and let robotics handle the rest. The laziest orgasm in history.
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Dame
A tiny vibrator that fits between your fingers like a guitar pick. Textured tip. Rumbling motor. Designed by women, for hands that already know what they're doing but want a power-up.
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Lovense
App-controlled male masturbator with vibration AND contraction. Syncs with your partner's toy across the globe. The future is wild.
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Tenga
A woven-texture sleeve that looks like a fancy candle holder. Put it on your coffee table. We dare you.
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Crave
A smaller, more delicate vibrator necklace. Stainless steel. Discreet enough for a board meeting. Powerful enough for what comes after. The world's most dangerous accessory.
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Fleshlight
An open-ended compact Fleshlight for couples or solo use. Open on both ends so you can see the action. Called Vantage because apparently 'Peep Show' was taken.
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Geeky Sex Toys
A swirling galaxy-patterned silicone dildo that looks like the cosmos. One small step for man, one giant leap for your nightstand.
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Kiiroo
Pocket-sized AI stroker with FeelMe content syncing. Squeeze for variable tightness. AI subscription included. Fits in your pocket, powered by algorithms.
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TENGA
A reusable stroker with an internal coil that SPINS with every stroke. This one has a 'pixel' texture of tiny raised dots. Made in Japan. Sounds like a graphics card, performs like a pro.
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LELO
Dual-motor app-controlled prostate massager. 10 pleasure modes. Comes in a satin pouch like jewelry. 20% more pleasure than V1 — they measured.
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Hot Octopuss
G-spot vibrator with a squishy gel tip that bends to your anatomy. Dual motors let you mix treble and bass vibrations. It's basically an audio equalizer for your vagina.
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Dame
A sex pillow. Just a really well-designed, washable sex pillow. Not everything needs Bluetooth. Sometimes you need better angles.
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Lovense
Bluetooth rabbit that syncs with Max 2 so couples feel each other across continents. Long-distance relationships just got an engineering upgrade.
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Tenga
A squishy, cube-textured stroker that looks like a desk toy from the future. Squeeze it in meetings. Nobody will suspect a thing.
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Crave
A vibrator disguised as a necklace. Wear it to dinner. Nobody will know. Your little secret, literally.
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LELO
Palm-sized vibrator at 60 dB. So discreet you could use it during a conference call. We are not recommending that. Legally.
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Hot Octopuss
Vibrating butt plug with a flexible neck and wireless remote. The neck bends to fit your anatomy because one size does not, in fact, fit all butts.
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Lovense
Magnetic panty vibe controlled from anywhere on Earth. Dinner parties will never be the same.
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Tenga
Six disposable egg-shaped strokers, each with a different internal texture. It's like a Kinder Surprise but your mom definitely can't open it.
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LELO
Wand massager with 4-hour battery and extra-soft silicone that warms to touch. It's technically a 'body massager' if anyone asks.
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Hot Octopuss
Clitoral wand with PulsePlate oscillation technology. Broad head for external stimulation. Quiet enough for roommate situations. Allegedly.
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LELO
Sonic pulses stimulate parts of the clitoris you didn't know existed. Cruise Control maintains power when pressed harder, unlike your ex.
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LELO
Luxury rabbit with WaveMotion that mimics a come-hither motion. 8 settings, waterproof, costs more than your groceries. Priorities.
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LELO
App-controlled vibrating pleasure ring. Fully flexible to fit all sizes because LELO is body-positive and good at engineering.
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Forplay
A 4-piece sexy astronaut costume with metallic bodysuit and space patches. Houston, we have a situation.
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Leg Avenue
A 3-piece sexy astronaut costume with metallic bodysuit, belt with leg garter, and detachable clear hood. Houston, the eagle has landed. And she looks incredible.
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LELO
A motion-sensitive remote-controlled couples vibrator worn during intercourse. Dual arms for G-spot and clitoral. The docking procedure that NASA wishes they invented.
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Liberator
A 2-piece foam position aid set. Wedge + Ramp = mission-critical angle optimization. Made in USA. Your launch pad for orbital maneuvers.
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nJoy
A double-ended stainless steel wand for G-spot and prostate. Medical-grade steel, spacecraft-grade engineering. The most futuristic thing in your nightstand.
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TENGA
A rechargeable vibrating cock ring with 5 vibration strengths and 3 rhythm modes. 1.5x more powerful than the original. Made in Japan. Compact enough to fit in your pocket but let's not do that.
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